T-109 and counting

Well. Here I am again. Back for another year, after a depressingly Glastonbury Festival-free 2012.

This entry is cheating just a little, as I'm sat at home on my couch, my preparations for this moment, which..well, have been in place since I dragged myself off Worthy Farm last time around, mostly complete.

My preparations start stupidly early - I've had pretty much everything apart from my clothes packed since last summer (hey, you never know when an emergency festival situation might arise) but as my last entry shows, it doesn't stop me from freaking out as June draws closer and throwing money at everything I think might be useful.

Therefore, the last few days have been full of my usual preparations, which include:

1) Realising I've forgotten something important and having to rush out and buy it.

2) Working myself into a panic the day before I have to leave and convincing myself that I'm not ready.

3) Packing, unpacking, repacking, unpacking and throwing clothing around the room a lot.

Seriously. Two years of packing, three weeks of preparation, two days of panicking and THIS is the result?

4) Putting important bits and bobs (i.e tickets, rucksacks, clothes, shoes, contact lenses,car keys) down on a surface, only for them to inexplicably vanish a moment later.

5) Asking the cat where I've put things.

6) Overcompensating for being away and buying things like 900 cans of spaghetti hoops, 1,400 loaves of bread, 10 pigs worth of bacon) to keep my other-half sustained while I'm away.

7) Getting completely panicked that I've forgotten something. Then giving myself a stern talking to that there's nothing I can't actually buy on site if I actually have forgotten something, which I haven't.

8) Packing for every eventuality, including heatwave and hurricane. I hate the British weather.

9) Stocking up on alcohol and Pringles. I know I can't live on these alone, but..dammit, I'll give it my best shot.

10) A lot of faffing around and running up and down stairs looking for things I've already packed.

11) Suddenly getting convinced I haven't packed something, and having to unpack and re-pack everything.

12) Fake tanning my legs, just in case an unpredicted heatwave strikes.

13) Forgetting to wash my hands afterwards, and getting orange palms.

14) Obsessive weather forecast checking, which inevitably throws me into further panic.

15) Feeding my car with oil, water etc., and twiddling with various things under the bonnet, while my neighbours look on, impressed (in my head, at least.)

16) A quick shifty onto the site the night before I move in to blag a sweet, sweet camping spot (I say that..last night Ollie and Fiona had my tent up in a matter of moments, while I fiddled with collapsible poles and said things like '..I think that one goes there..' and '..ooh, the ground's a bit hard, isn't it?')

"I mock your attempt to save the goldfish in your car!"

17) Anxiety dreams that a) I slept through the festival entirely b) I get to the festival but forget to do any work because I'm having a great time, and my boss shouting at me c) Trying to get to the festival, arriving successfully on site, but when I open the boot of my car, all my stuff has turned into a goldfish tank. Which then breaks, and I'm trying to stop the water from leaking everywhere, and save the goldfish, who are all flopping around, while Michael Eavis watches and laughs at me and I scream at him to help me, and can't he see the fish are all dying?!  (Totally normal, I'm sure.)

So, all going according to plan, then. Let's do this thing.